A Weird Relationship
by 67OtakuGirl24X3
Summary: As seen on my AO3: Gundam and Souda are dating (sort of). Souda wants to have SOMETHING to show for their relationship... But of course, with Gundam, things can't exactly go flawlessly.


A week had passed since Gundam and Souda became a couple.

Neither of them really knew how they had come to this. They had been arguing- neither of them had any memory as to what the topic was- when suddenly they froze midsentence, caught each others' eyes, and started blushing (something Gundam immediately hid behind his scarf). Through some mysterious, unspoken agreement, it was concluded that they had feelings for each other.

But that was about it. As expected from the opaque way by which they had realized their love for each other, the details of their relationship were… unclear. Besides the fact that their conversations became a little less heated and they stood and sat together at each given opportunity, there was no evidence showing that they were involved in any sort of romantic relationship. Souda was impatient. If he and Gundam were going to be dating, he wanted to get something out of it. He wanted _progress._ So, on the way back from dinner, he stopped his "boyfriend."

"Oy, Gundam… You wanna come back to my cabin for a little bit?" In his head, he sounded smooth and casual, but in reality his voice was quivering. What did he have to be so nervous about? Gundam was a weird guy. Even if his plan went wrong, it wasn't as if he would _care…_ If anything, Gundam would most likely be the one to mess things up. …Perhaps _that_ was what he was worried about.

"The question is not whether or not I desire to come with you. The proper inquiry in this situation would be whether or not I am _able_ to. Fortunately, I would both fancy retreating to your cabin _and_ I have no prior arrangements that would prevent me from doing so."

Every time Gundam opened his mouth, it left Souda momentarily speechless. He wasn't sure if this was a good or bad thing. "…cool." Glancing away awkwardly, Souda started to slide his hands into the pockets of his jumper as they began to walk down the deck; however, only one hand made it, as the other was suddenly grasped by Gundam. Souda's head swiveled around to look at him, eyes wide. Gundam was looking straight ahead, unfazed, as if he hadn't just made physical contact with Souda for the first time ever. His grip was too tight and a little clumsy, but the important thing was that they were holding hands.

"…Gundam, you're-!"

"Silence. The research I have conducted concludes that a typical display of human affection is to take thy partner's hand in thine while walking." He interjected forcefully, never once sparing Souda a glance. His scarf was pulled up to his nose, though, so there was the possibility that he _was_ embarrassed by his own action, at least enough for his cheeks to turn red. Souda grinned childishly at the thought.

"Hold on, _research?"_

"Yes. I would never commit myself to an ordeal I haven't the slightest notion about! I have managed to grasp the basic concepts," Gundam explained in a tone that was both incredulous and proud.

"….well, gee," was all Souda could think of to say. They walked the rest of the way in silence, but Souda managed to squeeze Gundam's hand in return along the way.

They didn't release each other's hands until Souda closed his door and both of them sat side-by-side on his bed. He felt his face heat up as he gathered the courage to tell Gundam what he had brought him here for. He knew what he wanted to do, but never considered how to bring it up… Just as he started to open his mouth, though, Gundam spoke. "May I present you with a hypothesis I have reached?"

Souda's mouth clamped shut immediately, then opened a bit, then shut again, like a fish out of water. "…sure?" he managed after a moment.

"Judging by your positive response to my affectionate gesture and your rash nature, I assume you have led me to your residence with the intention of either engaging in sexual intercourse, or presenting me with a kiss."

The air caught in Souda's throat and he choked, his entire face turning a shade of pink that rivaled his hair color. "Holy shit, man, we ain't gonna have _sex!_ It's WAY early for that! Way, way, WAY early! I…. I ain't even _thought_ about sex yet! Hell, I probably never will! N-not that I don't find you attractive enough or anything, it's just…. We ain't gonna have sex right now!" he spluttered, accompanying his speech with rapid hand movements.

Gundam allowed his scarf to fall from his face, revealing a slight, teasing smirk. "I shall note that you did not deny my second possibility."

Souda's entire demeanor deflated like a balloon. Shifting in embarrassment, he rubbed the back of his head and stared at his lap. "Well uh, yeh… I mean… We're a couple, right? I think we both kinda know that. But, like… We don't do nothin' to show it! I mean, we don't have ta be public about it or anything, but… I though the _least_ we could do was, y'know… Kiss."

"I believe that is a _splendid_ proposal," Gundam agreed, crossing his arms haughtily and nodding twice. Souda's eyes widened; he hadn't expected Gundam to be so… agreeable. He looked up to find that Gundam was staring at him, in a way that was unnerving yet also a little reassuring, somehow. "Allow me to warn you that this may not be one of my finer skills, as I have learned that the act of kissing is something that must come naturally, and a majority of my human instincts have been abolished."

Not even a beat later, Gundam had Souda's cheeks clasped firmly between his hands, and he was closing the gap between them. Souda let out a small gasp as their lips made contact. He wasn't ready for that at all, and it had been _his_ idea in the first place! His mind drew a blank, and he only sat there until Gundam pulled away. "Was that satisfactory?" Gundam asked, their faces still close enough that Souda could feel his breath.

"I dunno-! You caught me off guard!" Souda shrieked, blushing like a humiliated young girl.

"…hm… I humbly apologize. To compensate, I will allow you to initiate the next one. Perhaps then it will be more pleasurable for you, as you will be prepared."

"…r-right…" Souda inhaled deeply, scooting a little closer to Gundam on the bed. "Uh, sorry if it's kinda messy… I ain't ever kissed anybody…" It was an embarrassing fact to admit, but it wasn't like Gundam couldn't relate. He didn't respond; only sat there silently, patiently waiting for Souda to make a move. Souda gulped and started to move in.

As the distance between their lips began to shrink, Souda noticed that Gundam had closed his eyes. …that was a relief… He had honestly expected Gundam to be one of those guys that kissed with his eyes open and made things awkward. Souda realized as he thought this that his _own_ eyes were open, and quickly clamped them shut. Hopefully he wouldn't miss Gundam's mouth or anything embarrassing like that….

Finally, their lips made contact. It seemed to have gone alright- it lasted for about five seconds, and then Souda pulled away- but Souda's heart was beating so hard he couldn't quite concentrate. So, he decided to be a little bit daring and leaned in for another kiss just as Gundam started to reopen his eyes. This one was better; maybe it was because Souda's heartbeat had reduced to giddy flutters, or because he could actually concentrate on making it the best kiss he could. He was honestly afraid of what kissing Gundam would be like- what if he had a skin disorder or something?- but he found that his lips were actually smooth and cool, like marble, and pleasantly tasteless. Plus, it seemed that despite being disturbingly socially inept and hardly even human, Gundam had quite a knack for this sort of thing.

They never pulled away for more than a few seconds. The kisses were beginning to heat up, as if compensating for all the fiery arguments they hadn't had since they started dating. Their bodies were now pressed up against each other, Souda's hands on Gundam's knee and chest and Gundam's hands on Souda's cheek and the back of his head, each kiss increasing in pressure. Heart pounding in his chest, Souda decided it was time to kick things up a notch. Surely somewhere in Gundam's "research" he had stumbled across the concept of French kissing….

It was apparent that he had, as Gundam allowed Souda to slip his tongue into his mouth without even the slightest inclination of confusion. It was a weird and erotic sensation, and Souda felt his cheeks flush again. It was actually a bit disgusting, feeling his tongue against Gundam's…. Maybe he should stop-? Just as he began to part their lips, he felt Gundam's tongue enter his own mouth. He opened his eyes and gasped against the forceful kiss; it certainly felt different when it was being done _to_ him… His eyelids drooped closed again, and he allowed his strange partner to explore his mouth.

Things couldn't be going any better. Once he got past the lack of sanitation, Souda actually found himself enjoying this form of kissing, and it seemed like Gundam was experiencing similar feelings. Plus, he realized, since they were a couple and everything, they could probably do this _every night_ if they so desired… His open lips started to turn up into a grin when suddenly-

"Sweet underworld!" Gundam peeled himself away as if Souda's face had caught on fire, his bicolor eyes wide in horror and his fingertips flying to his mouth "I… I have been pierced! Scraped! What on earth… Is this sorcery?! Have I allowed the Devil himself to take me?!"

Souda's heart throbbed harder, but not in the ecstatic way it had been just a moment ago. His eyebrows furrowed together in concern and befuddlement. "Gundam, what the hell're you talking about-?"

But then he noticed it. Trickling out of the corner of Gundam's lips was a thin trail of blood; his tongue was bleeding. …oh, no. Souda felt the guilt and embarrassment swell up inside him as he realized what had just happened. During Gundam's erotic exploration of his mouth, he must have scraped his tongue against Souda's teeth… "Hey, hey, calm down, babe! You probably scraped against one of these guys," he explained in the calmest tone he could muster. He opened his mouth wide and pointed at his rows of shark-like teeth.

Gundam froze in place.

"…..fascinating! You… You possess a key trait of the planet's carnivores!" He leapt toward Souda, pressing their noses together in a way that was anything but romantic, his eyes wide in wonder. "How did you come to possess such a feature?! Raised by a wolf, perhaps? Or defeated the sea's greatest predator in an epic battle? Received a transplant from the king of the jungle?"

Souda just blinked at him, trying to keep up. "…uh… Nope… They just kinda, got this way."

As opposed to calming him down, this seemed to rev Gundam up even more. "Magnificent! You must have underworld royalty in your bloodline, or perhaps a great curse has fallen upon you…"

"…I think I'm just weird."

Gundam scoffed. "If there is something I have noticed amongst you humans, it is that you often misuse the term 'weird.' For instance, in many cases I overhear my human peers murmur that _I_ am 'weird.' However, they misunderstand. You are not weird. _I_ am not weird. We are, in essence, _gifted."_

"…right." Yet, that actually made Souda feel a little bit better. He grinned a tiny bit, and pressed a kiss to Gundam's pale forehead. "Sit tight, I'll go get you a towel to stop the bleeding…"

Gundam held up his arm as Souda started to stand. "There will be no need. I shall allow my blood to flow, to honor that I have been given permission to become one with a creature of your high standing."

"Dude, I'm really just a guy with some funky teeth…!" Souda insisted, though he was holding back a laugh. Gundam shook his head stubbornly.

"You, too, have allowed your physical form to merge with the prospects of the animal kingdom. Perhaps our courtship truly has been blessed by the stars."

 _So in English,_ Souda thought, _he's saying maybe we are kinda meant to be._

When the bleeding stopped, they started kissing again, until the nighttime announcement chimed. As Gundam left, he flashed Souda what seemed to be a grin of newfound admiration. Souda feebly grinned back.

…Gundam's reasoning was a little bizarre, but his message wasn't exactly wrong. Maybe this odd pair _would_ work out… Somehow.


End file.
